I've been gradually telling a few more people about what I'm trying to accomplish. I never say, "I want to lose 75 pounds," of course, but I say that I'm going to the gym. Everyone sounds surprised. Surprised that I'm telling them, maybe, but because I like to spoil even the greatest of accomplishments, I feel that they expect me to fail. I don't think I'll fail, but that's not a guarantee. I can only keep trying, I guess. There is, of course, the failsafe that I'm paying $64 a month to belong to the gym, and I'm a frugal bitch at heart.

If you hadn't noticed, I'm in a terrible mood.

I don't feel more energized, I don't have an increased self-worth. All I have is the sense that this is going to take a very, very long time.