I think I originally started this blog as a way to keep myself on track. I'm so glad that I decided to do that, and stuck with it, because now I have some notes on what I was feeling during that incredible, life-changing year. Incredible because I still can't believe I did it. I think I stopped blogging for the most obvious reason--I didn't have anything else to say. The struggle, the actual losing, was over.
But, the struggle won't ever really be over. I still have to keep the weight off, of course. But the harder part is connecting the physical me with the mental me. I look at pictures of Beth Ditto and instantly I think of myself. Except that's not me anymore.
I've been reading a lot of "fat" blogs and articles lately, mostly about fat acceptance. It makes me feel guilty. I should have not tried to lose weight, but gone the much harder route and learned to be happy with my body. These women have done what I can't seem to do--love myself, no matter what.