Finally lost! I hate the waiting game, so glad it's over, now I can keep plugging away.

Owner of the gym approached me again, asked how my weight loss was going. Still made me uncomfortable, like he might judge me based on how much I did or did not lose in the time since he asked me last. For the record, it was six weeks ago, and I've lost 7 pounds in that time. Totally a normal amount of weight to lose in six weeks. So my lack of rationality continues.


I used to be ashamed of my stretch marks. But that was when they were "new," when I was heavy and still gaining. They were a bright pink, and I thought they were my most noticible feature. I hated the ones on my arms the most, since they were the ones people were most likely to notice, as I didn't (still don't) wear shorts. By now, they have faded to pale. Unless you're looking, you won't find them. I have them all over, and I know they won't go away just by losing weight. I won't lie, I still don't like them. But they've been around for so long, I just think of it as the texture of my skin. This is what my skin has always looked like; why would it look any different when I drop, 10, 20, 80 pounds?

I have never "held my weight" in my face, as they say. I've lost all this weight, and I still look the same when I brush my teeth in the morning. I'm wondering how different I will look when I'm close to my goal. Maybe I don't expect any difference at all.